AGING ICON

The Dangerous Assumption Hidden in One Simple Question

Yesterday, I walked out of my eye doctor’s office feeling oddly triumphant. After the exam, the doctor smiled and said, “Your eyes look great. No signs of aging.”

Now honestly, once you reach a certain age, that’s not exactly the feedback you expect to hear during a medical appointment. I got into my car feeling grateful, amused, and maybe just a little smug.

Then reality stepped in.

I pulled into my parking lot only to find a large truck blocking my parking space. I politely asked the driver if he could move. “Can’t,” he said. “Need another half hour. Already set everything up and I need to stay close to the hose.”

Under different circumstances, I might have been annoyed. But it was lunchtime, I had skipped breakfast, and I decided to make lemonade out of the inconvenience. I headed to one of my favorite beach restaurants with its laid-back tiki bar, ocean breeze, and vacation vibe.

As I walked up to the bar, a man nearby struck up a conversation. He was loud, overly friendly, and talking to everyone within a 20-foot radius. He was a bit too gregarious, maybe chemically enhanced. It’s hard to say.

He asked why I’d come to the restaurant, so I told him the story about the truck blocking my parking space. Then he looked at me and casually asked, “So, what did you used to do?”

Used to do.

Not:
“What do you do?”
Not:
“Tell me about yourself.”
Not even:
“Are you retired?”

Straight to past tense.

As though grey hair, wrinkles, or being at a beach restaurant during the week automatically means your meaningful life is behind you.

I was stunned for about two seconds and then my blood started to boil.

I looked him straight in the eye and said, “I am a legacy coach.” He blinked, then came the follow-up, “Oh, you still work?”

And there it was again.

The assumption that if you’re over a certain age, you couldn’t possibly still be building, leading, creating, contributing, or owning a business. Maybe you’re helping out. Maybe you’re “the secretary.” But surely not the person in charge.

Here’s what people need to understand, Aging Icons don’t “used to do” things.

We still do things.
Big things.
Meaningful things.
Impactful things.

And perhaps it’s time we stop politely swallowing comments like these and start reframing the conversation. Here are a few responses Aging Icons can keep in their back pocket when someone quietly tries to place them out to pasture:

1. “Actually, I’m still building.”
   Because many of us are launching businesses, writing books, mentoring others, consulting, creating art, traveling the world, and reinventing ourselves long after society expects us to fade into the background.
2. “I’m in my legacy years, not my invisible years.”
   Legacy years are often our richest years because they combine wisdom, resilience, confidence, and perspective.
3. “I have extensive experience and experience doesn’t expire.”
   Aging is not the loss of relevance. In many cases, it’s where real value begins.
4. “Why do people assume life stops at 60?”
   Sometimes the best response is a thoughtful question right back.
5. “I’m not done yet.”
   Honestly, this may be my favorite.

Because people over 50, 60, 70, and beyond are starting businesses, falling in love, learning new skills, traveling the world, becoming activists, mentoring younger generations, and stepping into entirely new chapters.

The real issue isn’t wrinkles or grey hair, it’s outdated thinking.

We’ve been culturally conditioned to associate aging with decline instead of evolution. Yet everywhere I look, I see vibrant, engaged, curious people contributing enormously to their families, communities, businesses, and the world.

So yes, yesterday started with an eye doctor telling me my eyes showed “no signs of aging.” The bigger vision test came later at a tiki bar, and I passed that one too.

May 8, 2026 Posted by Aging Icon | Uncategorized | aging, business, legacy, mental health, Networking, seniors, social media, writing | Leave a comment