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The “Congratulations on Your Promotion” That Never Happened

The other day I updated my LinkedIn profile. Nothing dramatic and no big announcement of a career change. It was just a routine update, something many of us do from time to time to tweak our profile.

Within hours, my notifications started filling up. Lots of congratulations and best wishes. It seems like people were excited for me and felt the urge to let me know. I was happy to be acknowledged only there was one big problem. There was no promotion, no career change or big move.

The well wishes were based on the LinkedIn message but if anyone had taken a moment to actually look at my profile, they would have seen that nothing of the sort had happened. I had simply updated some information. Now before you think I’m annoyed, and yes, I’ll admit it is a bit of a pet peeve, this really got me thinking about something bigger. How often do we respond automatically instead of thoughtfully?

LinkedIn sends notifications suggesting that someone in our network has a new job, an anniversary, or a promotion. With one click, we can “congratulate” them. It takes two seconds, and we move on, but if we’re honest, many of those messages are written without ever looking at the person’s profile or understanding what actually happened.

What could have been a meaningful moment of connection becomes a reflex and reflexes rarely build real relationships but (spoiler alert),  isn’t that we’re supposed to be doing when on the platform.

I’m not suggesting we all stop acknowledging people because recognition and encouragement are wonderful things, but they mean more when they come from a place of genuine attention and not rote response.

Instead of the automatic “Congrats!”, what if someone wrote “It looks like you’ve been doing some interesting things lately. What are you working on now?”  It also would have been nice to hear someone’s comments on all of the  new videos that I posted, and even better, if they watched some of them and then commented. That’s the start of a real conversation and conversations are where relationships live and grow.

For those of us who believe in connection, especially as we continue to evolve in our careers and lives, this matters.

A thoughtful comment shows curiosity, a wonderful quality in people of all ages. Then, curiosity leads to conversation, and conversation leads to relationships and perhaps, but not in all cases, these conversations evolve into a new client or a solid referral.

Doing this might take longer, and I know we’re all pressed for time, but honestly, anything worth doing is worth doing the right way. (I can hear my Mother saying those very words to me!)

Respond like a human being, skip the emojis, read the post, take a look at the profile, and see how much more you get out of LinkedIn.

March 16, 2026 Posted by | Uncategorized | , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Kurt’s Story: Finding the Right Place, Not Just Any Place

When I met Kurt, he was in a rehabilitation facility recovering from a fall. His life had been anything but ordinary.

In 1939, his family fled Berlin, pretending to be on vacation. They traveled through Italy and Africa before settling in Argentina, where Kurt grew up among other Jewish refugees. He later studied food chemistry in Cuba, immigrated to New York, built a career, and eventually became a teacher.

Kurt’s consuming passion was collecting books written in Germany before Hitler’s rise. He believed those books contained warnings about how societies unravel, and he took that seriously.

By the time we met, he’d been moved from his home into senior housing, then into rehab after a fall. Staff found him difficult. Some called him “crazy” because he worried his phone was being monitored. He told me early on that he wanted out, and that he had money to make it happen. His bank account showed $15.

After obtaining limited power of attorney, we discovered someone had been draining his funds. The evidence pointed to his home health aide, who had been using his debit card for online purchases, timing withdrawals to follow his monthly deposits. We filed a police report, and federal banking protections allowed the bank to recover twelve months of stolen funds.

With his finances restored, Kurt moved into assisted living. But problems followed. He’d walk the halls talking about history and patterns he saw repeating in the world. Staff moved him to the memory unit.

Kurt didn’t have a memory problem; he had a purpose problem.

Through our conversations, I learned he’d been deeply involved with a synagogue and a rabbi he’d known since South America, someone running a project reconnecting descendants of Jewish refugees with their heritage. I reached out and the rabbi came the next day. Kurt immediately lit up. That’s when it became clear that Kurt needed a place where his identity and interests actually meant something.

I found an orthodox senior residence. The food was kosher, and the activities director knew his books. Other residents wanted to listen, and Kurt was invited to give regular talks on pre-Hitler Germany. The man labeled “difficult” became a valued voice in his community. He just needed the right room.

What This Story Shows

  1. Behavior is often misread when the environment is wrong. Confusion and agitation can simply mean someone’s identity isn’t being recognized.
  2. Financial exploitation is more common than families expect. Even trusted caregivers can misuse access and acting quickly matters.
  3. Purpose doesn’t expire. Older adults want to share what they know, and when that’s possible, everything changes.
  4. Fit matters more than proximity. Culture, language, history aren’t extras, they’re the whole thing.
  5. Advocacy changes lives. Sometimes you need someone who can step back, ask questions, and see the full picture. That’s the work I do.

PS. The accompanying photo is from a wonderful networking meeting where we got to enjoy ourselves on the beach. Aging Icons all!

March 8, 2026 Posted by | Uncategorized | , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment